On finding an Esoteric Mentor
By Robert Francis Rubin
No.. im not looking for a mentor lol! Actually this post is directed out at those of you who are actually looking to further your training/understanding/practice under the guidance of a potential magickal mentor.. Or a psychic one at that.. either way this little guide should help you find what your looking for, and keep you safe from what your not…
Why Am I writing this? The answer is simple. I have had the blessing of a wonderful mentor (God Rest her soul) as I have also the displeasure of having in more than one occasion horrible c mentors in the past who looked to use the guise of mentoring as simply a means to further their fragile egos.. however in reality.. the experience of having a mentor can either very inspiring, or ever so demoralizing..
Early on in my life I was lucky to have the honor to have had the right person find me.. I attribute to her (lets call her Alice) many of the traits I have chosen to follow in terms of magick and ethical practices of the spirit world.. Alas. With all eventuallity we somewhat went seperate ways when I left my home country and moved here..
Never the less in my years here I have discovered one thign about looking for a mentor, and one thing about being a mentor and I want to share them now..
When looking for a Magickal/Occult mentor you are looking for that person for one PRIMARY reason and one SECONDARY reason..
The Primary reason is.. you guessed it! to LEARN….
The secondary reason which most people are unaware of is for a semblance of GUIDANCE during your coming of age into the spirit world..
It is here though that the problem lies.. Many people are TOO willing to become a mentor to someone but for all the wrong reasons… People think that taking on an apprentice or a student is something that would bring them power over someone, or boost their own self worth in the process. when in fact the duty of a mentor is to give QUALIFIED and CLEAR instruction and teachings to the person they are mentoring..
If this is not happening then you are not under guidance of a mentor, you are instead under the thumb of a power hungry biggot..If you arnt learning then there is no reason to have that relationship to begin with.. It simply can and will be used as a means of the quasi-mentor to etch control over you..
I remember once i had the displeasure of having someone offer to me to ‘be their apprentice” When I said I needed time to think about it. He said no. choose now or never.. so being the fool that I was I decided heck maybe I can learn something from this person. I was sorely dissapointed..
Instead of teaching me things he was making me do things I already knew.. There was no learning, instead he was trying take credit for things that I learned on my own and already mastered in the process. When I asked him for teaching he would say without any validation or objectivity that my process was wrong and that i should do I again and again the more I would listen to this so called mentor the more I realized that I was being played. There was no learning taking place, no real instruction no guidance or training. Instead I found myself temporarily answering to someone who thought themselves to be the center of the occult universe.. This to me is the sign of someone who was in fact possessing a VERY low self esteem and just trying to control me. in effect that relationship ended badly..
A true Mentor in these arts will always RESPECT and HONOR their student, they will grow with the student and see that their learning is validated with careful guidance and a nurturing heart.. Correction is part of the training process yes. but Power tripping on a student is not..
Lastly. Beware the mentor who will try to destroy who you are.. There have been many monsters and nightmares out there who will force students into doing things that are so contrary to their personal beliefs and ethics that it leaves the students shattered inside and thus beings the process of corrupting the soul of the poor student. This has in effect happened in many ways, be it the demanding of sexual favors, to the demanding that the student do things that stand against their morals…. Believe me when I say that 99% of the time this has next to nothing to do with learning and more to do with problems within the so called mentor…
so remember these words.. If your not learning.. then its not mentoring.. its exploitation..